testing_the_box | TEST DRIVE MEME

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TEST DRIVE MEME

Starting now, we'll put up a new one of these very month! Feel free to use the current setting of Pandora (Christmas in July) or make up your own! You can also use the following scenarios if you'd prefer:

1. Mushroom Kingdom

Have you ever wanted to be a fairy? Well now you are, even if the answer was no! The City is a big, big place, all of a sudden. Houses are roomy affairs inside giant mushrooms, there are colorful flowers everywhere you look, and the animals are always friendly! Unfortunately, the only food items being sold in the market this month are fruit, fruit, and.... more fruit.

2. School Town

You may be too old to attend the academy, but that doesn't seem to matter; your attendance is mandatory anyway. Or perhaps you're there to teach, because you're the only resident of Pandora that possesses a certain skill. It doesn't matter if it can't be learned; you have to come up with a lesson plan anyway. At least the uniforms aren't some god awful color, right?

3. Zombie Apocalypse.

There's no coming back from death in Pandora, so you'd better do all you can to survive. Three quarters of the city are already infected, and this is the last stand. Are you going to pool your resources and try to make it together, or is it time to stop trusting others and go it alone until the month is over?

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[Cu Chulainn pauses in his attack, a puzzled look on his face.]

Why'd I want something from a store when there's fresh for the taking here? Go on, Pretty Lady. Step aside. I'm good at this. It ain't gonna feel a thing! And don't you worry! I'll clean it for you! You won't have to dirty that pretty white skin.

[His eyes fall on the rabbits as he waits for her to move and then his puzzlement seems to suddenly fade.]

Oh! Would you rather bunny 'stead? Gotta grab a couple of those for a decent meal, but...

Absolutely not!

[ Cecil gets to her feet right away and practically tackles the man with the spear. She throws herself at him, meaning to push him away now, but he's a lot more solid in his footing than she anticipated on such short notice and it feels a little more like bumping into a wall. Still, she's not deterred. ]

This is where I live! I won't permit you to kill these creatures when you have no need to. If you insist on behaving this way, I will remove you from these grounds myself.

[Cecil's actions startle Cu Chulainn for a moment, but it's a short moment and soon his surprised look is replaced with a smirk.]

Well...ain't you a frisky one. If you wanted to do something 'sides eat first, why didn't you just say so?

[His spear disappears and once his hands are free, he wraps them around Cecil, pulling her against himself.]

We can play 'fore eating. I ain't got nothing else planned for today and it ain't every day I got such a beauty throwing herself into my arms...

[ The paladin turns almost as red as the roof of her mushroom house. Cecil has always been one slow to anger, but the stranger is certainly trying her patience. She clenches her jaw and speaks through gritted teeth: ]

Let me go or I assure you— you will be in no condition to play with anyone for quite a while.

Ha! You're a feisty one, ain't ya Lass?

[Cu Chulainn leans forward and flashes Cecil an almost feral grin. Excitement glints in his eyes...and then he surprisingly, lets her go.]

You're gonna make me work for it, right? Cause the chase is part of the fun! Ain't nearly so much fun when ya don't bite back!

[ Cecil takes a step backwards, hoping to stay out of his reach now that she knows he has no sense of personal space. She doesn't look amused by his remarks either. ]

If your hope is to flatter me, I'm afraid you've wasted your time, since I am certain you say as much to any woman who will listen.

[ She can't quite resist being rude, though she regrets the quip the moment it leaves her tongue. She takes a breath in an attempt to calm down. With all the commotion, most of the animals that were loitering around her house have fled now. A few of the rabbits have decided to linger though, lurking in the flower beds still with their noses twitching curiously while they watch the people. Cecil, still frowning, brushes her hair away from her face. ]

I'm sorry— but you can either leave or come inside for a meal, if you agree to respect my home and my wishes.

Not everyone, Lass. Just the pretty ones.

[He flashes her a grin that seems to suggest somehow he thinks that's better. He then brings his hand to his chin and rubs it.]

Hmm... I certainly wouldn't mind a good meal right now. Ain't had one since I got here. I take promises pretty seriously, though. You gotta tell me a little more 'bout what these wishes of yours might include 'fore I can agree...

I was hardly asking for a binding contract.

[ Cecil feels a little offended by the implication that she would ask something dishonorable of him, but she tries to let it go. ]

As long as you don't try to kill anything anymore...

[Cu Chulainn is quiet for a while, watching the few rabbits that are still lingering around. Then he shrugs, smiling widely.]

If ya mean the fuzzy ones... Fine, fine. I won't kill any of 'em, but I can't say that for anyone who might attack me. I don't know this area very well. I have no idea what might happen. 'Specially not with evil spirits like the ones that talked to me earlier wandering 'bout.

No one is going to attack you. I've been here for several months now and I've very rarely needed my weapon to defend myself. The ones in the masks are not evil spirits. They don't do anything besides dole out punishment for law-breaking. They're called Management.

Dole out punishments? Sounds evil 'nough to me. Man...you serious when ya say no one fights here?

[Cu Chulainn rolls his eyes, suddenly looking almost as if he's...pouting.]

If no one fights 'round here, what do you do for fun? Ain't nothing more fun than a good fight! Well...

[He smirks slightly.]

...a good round of huntin' ain't bad either, but ya just asked me not ta do that, so...

They enforce the law. It's no different from what any authority presence in a community does.

[ Cecil sighs and begins to walk to the front of the mushroom house. ]

I don't... like that they keep us here, but they are not malicious.

[ She opens the door for him-- and suddenly notices the damage done to the outside of her home. She looks back at the man with another unhappy expression. ]

They've done much less damage to where I've chosen to live while here over the last few months than you have so far in your handful of minutes, at least.

[ Well, she supposes she can't quite blame him. Curiosity-- it's what got all of them here in the first place, after all. Cecil gestures for him to follow her inside. ]

And I didn't say no one fights-- I only meant that I haven't needed to fight anyone out of a need to protect myself from other residents. I'm certain that there are those would not mind a spar from time to time, but there is plenty to do here.

[Cu Chulainn shrugs. Calling them authority really doesn't help him feel any better about them, since he and authority don't really get tend to get along. He hadn't even gotten along that well with his Master, though he had listened to what he had been told--for the most part. If for no other reason than to have a change to give the bastard the payback he deserved...

...and he been distracted by fighting. That too.

His eyes follow her as she looks at the damage he did to her house, but only shrugs again when he sees her expression.]

Ain't gonna 'pologize for the house. If ya ask me, it could use some work anyway. Kinda...overly cute, really.

[He stops before following her into the house to look back out at the city.]

Sure hope there's people out there who wanna spar. Can fight a real fight. Can't hunt. I don't really care if there are other things to do here, if there's no sparring, I'm gonna be damned bored!

[ Cecil doesn't exactly know what to think of that— the eagerness for a fight. It makes her a little anxious, truthfully, but she easily gives the benefit of the doubt. ]

I... was not asking for an apology... but I don't think it's right to punish me for something I could not control. I was here before the house was turned into a mushroom.

Bah... I ain't punishin' ya for nothing. You'd know it if I was....

[He looks out over the rest of the nearby houses.]

You sayin' this place ain't always like this? Do I wanna know what it like 'fore I got here?

Well, when I first settled here, it was a gingerbread house. All the buildings were. I thought this one looked the least like someone's dessert of all the other homes I'd seen at the time. It was during a winter festival of sorts. They called it Christmas. The city's appearance changes from time to time. In a few weeks, I suspect the mushrooms and flowers will be something else.

[ She pauses just past the threshold. ]

Are you coming?

How...annoyin'. An' I thought the Fae were bad. Ya should tell whoever's decidin' this stuff that food's for eatin'. It don't really make good houses...

[Cu Chulainn looks back at her and notices she's waiting for him. A few quick steps brings him to her side.]

Sorry, Lass. Got distracted. Lead the way.

[ Cecil lets him inside, then shuts the door behind them. The house actually looks decently normal on the inside besides the obvious fact that the walls are made out of mushroom. There's normal furniture, book shelves holding books and decorative knick-knacks, and there's even artwork and photographs hanging on the walls. The paladin walks to the kitchen, thinking about what she should cook—

Ah! Right... They haven't actually properly introduced themselves to each other.. ]

Unfortunately, I don't think Management takes suggestions. My name is Cecil, by the way.

Cu Chulainn...

[The answer is distracted since he is distracted looking around the house. Besides, he doesn't tend to actually use people's names all that much. He only does if they have earned the highest levels of respect with him and he hadn't known Cecil long enough for her to have done that.]

They probably should. Inside's not so bad. Suppose that's cause it's your doin' not theirs. Still...mushroom as a building material. Of all the bad ideas...

[One track mind. He has one...]

[ The paladin laughs softly as she opens the refrigerator, taking out the cut of meat she had removed from the freezer earlier to allow it to thaw out. Despite all the fruit in the markets, she still had meat-- not because she had hunted, but because she had some still preserved that she'd bought before the recent theme change. She takes the package to the sink and begins to open it under the water to clean and trim. ]

The mushrooms really bothers you. At least it's likely not permanent. Of course, we don't know what they will switch to next. I suppose it could be a giant boot next time.

Boot would be an improvement, Lass. It's made outta leather. Least that has a little toughness to it!

[Cu Chulainn starts poking at a nearby wall.]

Mushroom ain't got nothing to keep out the weather. Nothing to keep the animals from eatin' it either!

[ Cecil catches a glimpse of him poking at the walls again over her shoulder. She washes her hands, but leaves the sink running to continue rinsing the excess blood from the meat. Not bothering to dry her hands, she walks over to Cú Chulainn and grabs his wrist gently to pull him back from the wall. ]

If you please...

[ Then she lets go. ]

So far, the animals have only been eating the plants outside— tree fruit and flowers. But yes, sometimes it gets cold at night, especially if it rains.

[The blue-haired man chuckles under his breath when he realizes what he is doing and then gives her a totally unapologetic look.]

Oops?

But see, you prove my point! If it's cold when it rains, just 'magine what it will be like when it snows! Well...

[Suddenly, he winks at her.]

...'less you have someone to help keep ya warm that is.

[ Perhaps predictably, Cecil turns red at the last remark and the wink. She doesn't point out that others in the city probably don't have that problem, since there is a law in place that has caused most — herself excluded obviously — to share a home with at least two others. Instead of commenting on the matter herself, she goes back to preparing the meat. ]

I don't think mushroom is good to make houses out of either, but as it's unavoidable right now, we must make do with what we have. I don't think it will snow. The season they've chosen for the month seems to be spring.

[ She turns on the oven to preheat it, then goes to a cupboard to gather herbs and spices and vegetables. The last thing she gets is a knife so she can trim the fat and veins off the cut of beef. Cecil isn't particularly talented in cooking and she's certainly no royal chef, but as a soldier, she was taught the basics of preparing meals in order to help her survive out in the field and she's learned a lot more since having to survive by herself in Pandora as well. ]

So they pick the seasons to match? Well, that's somethin' at least.

[What he doesn't say.]

Anyone tried to eat the mushroom yet? Think it tastes any good?

[For some reason, the mention of eating finally focuses him on something other than the absurd building material that was chosen for the houses this month. Cu Chulainn walks over to where Cecil is working and peers over her shoulder.

Personal space? What's that?]

Speakin' of food... Whatcha cooking?

TEST DRIVE MEME

I expect there might be some spontaneous death soon, though...

Wiiinciiiiiiiiiing...

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